“Anal sex for depression”

She: “You could try listening to me for once, and understanding.  I don’t know why I feel like this. I don’t want to feel like this. And you banging on about how we don’t have sex any more really isn’t helping. Just… try and be a bit more understanding, could you?”

5 days later…

He: “I’ve done a bit of Googling, love. About the way you’ve been feeling.”

She: “Really? Wow. Thank you…”

He: “Yeah – it says that taking it up the shitter is fucking BRILLIANT for depression…”

He: *big hopeful eyes*

She: *speechless*

The conversations that I imagine happened around my new favourite search referral…